Because I was asked.

Emo Porn:

1. Where two or more people talk/think/theorise about sex without actually having sex.
2. Where there is an excess of emo between two or more people. The emo then get resolved without the physical sex when really the actual sex would have solved their problems much faster.
3. It is like angst except much more indulgent and prettier.

So, in conclusion, I like reading Emo Porn.

ETA: I shall NOT read the spoilers for 'Croatoan'. I shall NOT read the spoilers for 'Croatoan'. I shall NOT read the spoilers for 'Croatoan'. I shall NOT read the spoilers for 'Croatoan'. I shall NOT read the spoilers for 'Croatoan'. I shall NOT read the spoilers for 'Croatoan'. I shall -- *FAILS*!